I think we all have a lot of time right now to do some thinking - I know I do. I also think the most important things in our lives are rising up while the less important or obligatory parts are being let go of - for now. It's truly a beautiful thing. When are we ever going to have a chance like this again to slow down, evaluate what we're up to, soak in some snuggles, and settle down?
What does slowing down mean for you?
For me, it has meant a lot more reading, a lot more writing, and a lot more thinking. It's meant homeschooling the fellas - or trying my best to - more time to tidy and clean, and an even bigger appreciation for a simpler life. It's been a process, moving through the emotions that come with this interesting situation we all find ourselves in. And I am sure the emotions will continue to ebb and flow, as they always do. In the ebb of acceptance, I've found I have a lot more headspace and a sense of finding pieces of me that had been neglected.
For as long as I can remember I have wanted to be a writer - no, I am not quoting Harriet the Spy - this is the truth. I wrote my first book in Kindergarten, The Runaway Tshirt, and from then on I have always held in my mind that I would be a writer. It's funny to speak it out loud like this now and to evaluate the course of my life. In junior high, writing was my saving grace in language arts because reading comprehension wasn't my thing then - but isn't it subjective and horrible anyway? In high school writing was my refuge, I leaned into processing my feelings through my writing - much to my embarrassment when it was read aloud in class. I didn't go to school to be a writer - I actually switched out of my English Major to pursue a major in Italian Studies and take part in a study abroad in Italy! Yolo, am I right? And we've all been twenty before!
And yet here I am, years later, writing. My life and work has somehow always revolved around writing. Professionally, I have had and still have the honour of lifting the voices of other organizations. Personally, I have been able to share some of life's biggest, strangest, toughest, and amazing moments through writing.
All of my extra capacity for thinking lately has brought me back to myself, back to the writer in me, the girl who wrote The Runaway Tshirt and later - much later - watched Sex and the City thinking I too would pour over my laptop, writing my way through different topics and experiences. Full disclosure, I didn't think I would have a sex column!
In a way, I am doing this to an extent and I am so grateful. I know I want to do more of it though. I have been thinking about my writing - my writing - the pieces of my heart that I share here. Experiences as a new mom, as a thirty-something woman, as a human going through life. I am figuring out where my niche lies and how I can be more dedicated to bringing meaningful writing to life to share with those around me.
I'd love to know what, if anything, you connect with when you read my writing. I'd love even more to know if there is something you've always wanted to be or do - if you're ready to share. As always, thank you for showing up for me.
- lovefrommaria